Monday, August 28, 2006

The puzzle of life


Puzzles, such fickle creatures...Objects, whatever. I love puzzles as do most people I know, but have you ever lost a piece? You know, your almost done but there is still that one piece missing and you'll all agree I think, its a little bit irritating. It's almost like I become obsessive compulsive on the spot, I'm just so disappointed, it feels like there is something tugging on me or poking at me just to annoy me if I cant Finnish a puzzle, even(especially) if its just one piece. I can only think of one thing that ever got to me in that same way(because it is a very unique irritation) and that was a life where I could see people around me that had something amazing, and I didn't, and I didn't know how to get it. That something was Christ. Life without Christ is like that puzzle that is missing a piece, its incomplete, you could almost say its irritating. My whole life something was picking and poking and pulling at me and I just ignored it until it got to a point where I couldn't anymore. I had to turn everything upside down, look under every rock, check every couch cushion until I found that last puzzle piece, the one that fit. Low and behold as soon as I found that piece, Jesus, I felt complete, satisfied(not unlike the satisfaction from putting that final puzzle piece in). So that's my blurb, consider it please. If you haven't found it yet, I urge you to start looking for that puzzle piece, Jesus Christ. I promise that you wont have to look far because he's been waiting there right behind you your whole life, just hoping that you'll turn around and run into his arms and fill that gap in your life with him, because he is the only one that will fit.

Friday, August 18, 2006

I'm sorry

Well I guess a full understanding of the apology would only come to those involved in the situation I'm apologizing for, so I hope that they are reading this. Here I go. The past month and a half (almost 2 months) has been pretty hectic for me and has been riddled with various mistakes and bad choices mostly in the relationship field. Since sometime after the miss keswick valley pageant near the end of June I have been dating someone that I don't even know. Sounds weird right? Yeah, sounded just as weird in my head when I said it. I'll explain: I know her name, I know who she is and that whole deal, we've talked before, been distant friends for a while, I've know her for a long time. The problem comes in where we both decided that it was a good idea to date even though we had never been anything more than casual acquaintances. We thought that was enough to form some type of meaningful dating oriented relationship on and I should have noticed that this was waaaaaaay off. Big Mistake. We proceeded and continued to make choices and do things without thinking about them, and sadly enough, without showing the least bit of interest in what God would want us to do. As soon as the relationship started it became all about us instantly and God was completely boxed out. Sadly this took me a month to realize it....Wait, let me rephrase: It took me a month to act on it and try to repair it. I've heard a lot about Jonah lately and I don't think its coincidence. I can relate to his story in a way, God wanted me to do something but I just didn't feel like it, I wanted to do what I thought was right. I knew what I was doing was wrong I was more or less, not unlike Jonah, running from God and the funny thing is that I actually had that brief point in time where I thought I could get away with it. I had myself convinced that what I was doing was okay and that I had pulled one over on the one and only almighty God, the creator of the universe, Alex Roy outsmarted the beginning middle and end all on his own. WRONG! WRONG! WRONG! Then not too long ago, after going to camp and preaching to kids about what's good and bad what's right and wrong when it comes to relationships and various other things while I was still hiding, I came home and had that moment where I realized what I was doing and how stupid it was and I just wanted to kick myself in the head. Lucky me God provides us with easier ways to handle this stuff. Well for what happens next I am truly sorry about how I did it and I can honestly said I tried my hardest to be as graceful and gentle about it as I could but I still feel I screwed up and I want to apologize to her. So I'm still praying about it and trying to get right with God after I was so blatantly ignorant to his will. So to those I may have hurt, I am truly sorry and I hope you understand why I did what I did now.

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

I'm Back!

So, did you miss me??? haha. I know it's been a little while since I've updated but I have a good excuse, i was very busy.......and if you don't like it than you can go kick a donkey...better yet GET kicked by a donkey, yessssssss!anyways. I'm done with camp for the year and I'm kinda dissapointed about it, it went so quick. Good news though, my evaluation went very well and they invited me to come back next year so thats pretty wicked sweet. Not like you guys care, but my cabin came in third place in the obstacle course, right on!haha, it was sweet and the guys were pretty pumped about it. so yeah, sorry i cant think of anything else to talk about, i just needed to post to fill this huge time gap i left, I'm out.

Keep your stick on the ice!